Glad We’ve Cleared That Up


Good news, everyone! Our Betters at the European Commission have declared that the New Year’s Eve attacks by Muslim migrants have nothing to do with the migrant crisis. Whew! That’s a relief.

It was reported that in a minutes document from a meeting of the European Commission, Frans Timmermans, first vice president of the EC and deputy to President Jean-Claude Juncker, said that the NYE assaults “were a matter of public order and were not related to the refugee crisis.” In the minutes report the EC calls for “the unconditional rejection of false associations between certain criminal acts, such as the attacks on women in Cologne on New Year’s Eve, and the mass influx of refugees”.

Which makes it a little difficult to explain the over three-fold rise in the number of sexual  assault complaints from the recent Carnival celebrations at Cologne.

A total of 66 complaints for sexual insults or aggression were lodged between last Thursday [2/4/16] when the carnival got underway, and Wednesday morning. The previous year there were 18 such reports, police said.

However part of the rise could be due to “a change in the attitude of victims and witnesses,” the police added.

And there is also the fact that a heightened police presence compared to last year resulted in a decrease in other, non-sexual crimes.


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